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Showing posts from February, 2020

Gracefully Resigning

As you grow you’ll have opportunities to seek out your next job or opportunity. This exciting new step comes with a potential growth in position, responsibility, and hopefully, more money. While your excitement may beam when you accept the next job offer, you may have questions about how to leave the current position you’re in right now. Colonel Candid suggests you solidly think about your next step before positing a “I QUIT” sign on your cube and just take off. Take time to think about who will replace you, your actions and the impact on your reputation, and contemplation on what to say during an exit interview. Replacement. Remind yourself as you walk into your next job that you once arrived with new eyes and had those moments where you didn’t know who to go to for toner cartridges, help with travel, or where accounting was in the building. Better yet, don’t you recall when you needed some antacids or even where the shortest line for the best coffee in the neighborhood? When

Broken Trust

Trust is essential in many aspects of life. A century ago, a person’s trust relied on their handshake and their given work. Today more often, legal documents, sent via certified mail, ensure a written trail goes along with the establishment of an agreed upon action. For successful relationships and business interactions, trust remains one of the top requirements. Unfortunately, as you make your way through the ranks, you may experience a break in trust with your co-workers, leaders, and the organization. Let’s learn the importance of indicators of when you’re about to do a trust fall and no one is there to catch you. As an individual, you can recognize when you’re being ghosted, ignored, belittled or minimized. All these examples demonstrate a lack of trust with the person you’re dealing with. This happened to me in the past when I’d requested to meet with a supervisor to discuss my future employment opportunities. A gate keeper to the decision maker kept taking my call, even m

Finding a Mentor

There are some mentors who can convey knowledge and valuable lessons through both their words and actions. Examples of this are Nobel Prize winners mentored by previous Nobel laureates. In the military, aides to general officers are more likely to make general themselves because they fall under the umbrella of someone who can tell them about their profession. Similarly, a mentor can expand your vision. Serving as an example, guider, and demonstrator to how the keys to the castle work. The mentoring advice I’d give you is to immediately seek someone in your profession, in your workplace to start this process. Foster a work relationship and start to explore your role as a mentee through commonality, character, and influence. If you find someone with the skills in these three areas, you’ll be off to the races in no time at all. COMMONALITY. There are limits to finding someone to assist you and most of the time this fire needs a spark to create it. Most of us are somehow connected

The Only Thing Constant in Life is Change

Colonel Candid here starting this mentorship session with an adage my grandmother used to tell me. She served as a Women Accepted for Volunteer Emergency Service (WAVE) in World War II, for the Navy. It was a part of her history that I didn’t really know much about until I’d started serving in the military myself. I’d hear people referencing one of Grandma Bunny’s (yes, a former WAVE went by Bunny – short for Bernita) quotable quotes, “The only thing constant in life is change.” There’s a lot to unpackage in that statement but it does ring true. Let’s focus on leading in a time of change. More than likely, that’s what you’ll be doing and it’s best to have a clear path forward rather than fumble along. The likelihood of success increases through preparing, fulfilling, and maintaining change by the following: 1.        Stickiness. Don’t just throw change spaghetti at the wall and see what sticks. When you announce and change and expect people to just pick up on it, you’re in f

MLK’s Transformational Leadership

In complete admiration for a person who in a decade and a half completely changed the world from a position of oppression, we celebrate Martin Luther King Jr. As we look at different types of leadership we can use MLK as a phenomenal case study in understanding what transformational leadership. Colonel Candid here to profess my admiration of a person who was one of the world’s most impactful non-violent leader. I’d challenge you to try and immolate his leadership style. Application of this style begins with directly linking your ideas into action. This is extremely important when you don’t necessarily have the authority to tell people what to do but you can still achieve reform. MLK demonstrates that no problem is insurmountable by transformational leadership. Transformational leadership has the following characteristics: ·        Enthusiasm ·        Vision and Values ·        Lead by Example ·        Change in Common Goal ·        Motivation increases Effort ·        H

Thank You Letter to my Former Good Bosses

A Letter to my Former Good Bosses, Recently, I ran into one of you and shared in some stories over drinks I expressed thanks but there’s never enough gratitude to express all that you’ve done for me in just a quick conversation. So for all of you out there who’ve helped me along with this journey please share in my gratefulness of support.  Thank you for providing me with just enough of a challenge to ensure that I learned from your pointed criticism on areas to improve in my written and briefing products. Thank you for accepting me back with grace and calmness when I failed Jumpmaster school and even still, pushing me to take that assignment as the only female in an infantry brigade. Thank you for having my back when I heard the slurs of cunt and bitch thrown around. I was there when you shut them up and I’ll never forget how great that felt to have your support. Thank you for expressing how I beat you in a 10 km race and the humility you took to ad

Stepping Back: Appreciating History

If you’re a bit of a history nerd, like me, you appreciate a good museum. It’s encouraging that so many of you take time to appreciate and support efforts to preserve history. I come from a world steeped in history. Often this history is enlightening and inspiring. Join Colonel Candid and walk back in time to rejoice in where we’ve come from and to inspire you in the direction you are going. Ideally, you can complete these reflections during some of the federal holidays in the United States. To appreciate history look at the following three areas and tie them to our federal holidays. First, appreciating the men and women who’ve served, both past and present, in the Armed Forces and the sacrifices made by them and their families is captured all across America. Almost every military post, fort, camp, station or installation has a museum. Both Veteran’s Day, taken to appreciate those who’ve severed and Memorial Day, honored to remember those who’ve sacrificed the last full measur

Trust Me

Colonel Candid here asking about engagement, not the one with a ring but the type of engagement when you feel like you truly belong to a team. The connection between your co-workers and yourself allow you to speak freely and contribute to the work at hand. Building this type of team results in all sorts of positive impacts and Colonel Candid would like to uncover a couple of ideas on how people believe you when you say, “Trust me.” First, the scientific evidence is clear. Workers in a trusting environment are, “ more productive, have more energy at work, collaborate better with their colleagues, and stay with their employers longer than people working at low-trust companies ,” per Paul J. Zak, author of Trust Factor: The Science of Creating High-Performance Companies . It also makes common sense, the more you trust the people you work with the more satisfied you are with your jobs. You can begin by rewarding employees who’ve recently overcome a hard challenge. You could or

Confessions from a Backrow Meeting Attender

Please, give me permission to speak up. During a roundtable meeting, I’m pushed to the back row. You’re covering a topic adjacent to an area that I’ve spent my entire career studying. Unfortunately, I was given instructions to sit here and take notes. If I could speak up, I’d give you ample feedback on why this program may not work or give you an alternative viewpoint. I see people constantly editing their thoughts here. It makes it incredibly difficult to tiptoe around the landmines of issues in the organization. I wish I could ask you questions because I think we could expand on your goal. The extra five minutes on the topic could have shown you, the decision maker, what a gift this cost saving option really is and why just investing one more attempt at it would pay off. If we could all contribution to the discussion and downplay the loud squeakiest wheel in the room, you’d see unrecognized potential. We want to add value. The jokes from attendees about the need for youn

Get Moving on that Change

Off to the races. You’re launched, you’ve started, and change is underway. But wow, it’s more difficult than expected. All the sudden things aren’t moving as fast as expected and you’re like an engine about to stall. Colonel Candid here with some mentoring on how to get you back up front, leading like a boss (because you are a boss) and working to create real and lasting change. 1.        Embrace the Suck. Did you consider a pilot of the change to learn what’s needed to support the change? Probably not, pilots take work and you just dove in. Well, let’s reconsider that notion and work to create one. It will help you anticipate bumps in the road and clear a path for your change. 2.    And the “Biggest Winner” is. Recognize and award the achievements when change is underway. Look for constant and positive reinforcements. Why? This increases our ability to perform. 3.        Intentionality. Don’t let your goals run wild with this change. Make sure the systems within your organ

The Only Thing Constant in Life is Change

Colonel Candid here starting this mentorship session with an adage my grandmother used to tell me. She served as a Women Accepted for Volunteer Emergency Service (WAVE) in World War II, for the Navy. It was a part of her history that I didn’t really know much about until I’d started serving in the military myself. I’d hear people referencing one of Grandma Bunny’s (yes, a former WAVE went by Bunny – short for Bernita) quotable quotes, “The only thing constant in life is change.” There’s a lot to unpackage in that statement but it does ring true. Let’s focus on leading in a time of change. More than likely, that’s what you’ll be doing and it’s best to have a clear path forward rather than fumble along. The likelihood of success increases through preparing, fulfilling, and maintaining change by the following: 1.        Stickiness. Don’t just throw change spaghetti at the wall and see what sticks. When you announce and change and expect people to just pick up on it, you’re in f

You Suck as a Leader

Colonel Candid here in one of my most candid writings. Sometimes as much as I want to build you up, I’m also going to need you to self-reflect and find those areas where you are weakest. Let’s apply some serious elbow grease and get rid of these bad habits before they make you the leader who sucks. The reason you’re ineffective at leading could be one of several issues stemming from communication, trust, integrity, or planning. The impacts of these failures ripple across your team or organization. 1.        You talk the talk but don’t walk the walk. Please, we appreciate your lofty attempts at coaching, speeches, and the numerous vision statements you’ve posted around. Unfortunately, your inaction is evident every single day. The paper-thin goals you’ve put up aren’t working because you don’t provide us with the intent. Clear communication is key and we want to understand what you want of us. 2.        You could care less about your team. It’s evident that you micro-manage when

Driving

I learned how to drive in Iowa. Back then, you could start with your permit at 14 years old, after drivers’ education. My first car was a huge Monte Carlo Super Sport and I drove it excitedly amongst the single lane roads. With cornfields at my side my greatest fear was a winter ice storm or a family of deer darting across the road. Other than that, driving a car was simple. People were Iowa nice and they mostly obeyed the rules. Life paced by evenly with a steady volume of traffic on the road. When I turned 18, I moved to New York, my confidence in driving was wildly shaken. Instead of driving in a town with just a couple of stop lights, I now drove on roads with six lanes. Turn signals all of the sudden became optional and hand signals were often shared with me from other drivers. And most of the time it included only one finger. The pace speed up and I moved fast to stay with the increased speed and volume of cars. What a difference from one location to the next. It t

Lessons Learned from my Lyft Driver

During a recent trip back home, I struck up a conversation with the gentleman driving the car, Gopalreddy. After talking about his time in America and his home in India, we discussed everything from farming to computers. When I began to explain my passion about mentorship and teaching people the importance of it, he immediately brought up advice he’d received from his first mentor when he started driving. His examples were applicable to all of us and it’s amazing the lessons we can each teach each other. 1.        Be patient in all situations. Gopalreddy stated once a passenger was running late. He jumped in the car and started barking for him to go faster. He said, if I drive faster then I might get a ticket. If I get a ticket then you may be 30 minutes late, and not five. Plus, then I’ll have to pay the fine for speeding. Please, do not push your failing to plan onto me. 2.        Be polite. It does not take a lot to show kindness to each person who steps into my car.

Persuading Others

Have you ever had an idea that you so completely believe in that it subsumes you? That thing that keeps you up at night and sets your brain on fire? Here’s a chance to make it happen. To make this idea come into a reality you’ve got to work extremely hard with a knowledge of how to persuade others to your idea. Here are a couple of examples from Colonel Candid on how to get after turning your idea into a reality. To start off, take an assessment of who really can make this thing happen. Who is the big kahuna? Now, who influences that person? And again, what feeds those people? Are your ideas nested within a broader concept that needs shifting? You can look at what they read, listen to, and who they work with. Your research will pay off here. In the working world a great place to start is LinkedIn. What a golden tool of information! Use this along with your search engines to find out more information on your idea, on those who’ve gone before you and how to start to specifically tar

Get Out of Your Comfort Zone – Run that Marathon

Less candid today and more storyteller to highlight to you the importance of exercise. Over a couple of decades, I’ve learned more than I ever expected from an activity I picked up when I was young. I’d encourage you to find that thing that takes you to a state of flow . When I run, I’m fortunate, at times, to become completely immersed in this activity. Here the world falls away and clarity of the task at hand comes into center. These applications and lessons from marathoning directly align to life lessons. First, marathoning takes you out of your comfort zone. Putting on those shoes and starting each run is a new beginning. Recently, the term “ mindfulness ” has gained in popularity, a similar goodness occurs while running miles run in solitude. By taking time to spend with yourself and your own mind a type of release occurs. I call it defragging the system or clearing out the cobwebs in your brain. Second, marathoning teaches you goal setting. It does really take time to plan h